It is different but the same

Small town Indiana, the old home.  I haven’t been back here since 1978 or so.  A lot has ch anged and yet it hasn’t.  Once a population of over 12000, is now around 8000. Industry is gone for the most part, and the population is leaving to follow the jobs.   I am no spring chicken but the population here is old.   The main issues seem to be drugs, lack of local jobs, and a local government living in a dream state.  My sister worked in Ft, Wayne an hour drive each way on a good day.  She just quit her job at the VA hospital there, to work closer to her home.  I was shocked at the low pay for nurses in the VA, and the local VA guy in charge managed to cause an uproar by taking down the service flags and posting a gay pride flag one day last week.  The Ft Wayne news said the gay pride flag was removed later in the day, they forgot to mention that the vets tore it down.  Her stories of working there are typical of a government swamp,  they can’t be fired and refuse to work.,  It is time to find a solution for the VA, what they have is clearly not working.

As for my old home town,  I probably won’t be staying, I will go where I can find work and its not here.  I don’t think I can take an Indiana winter, and this weekend is suppose to be in the 90;s.    This next year is going to be interesting to say the least,

It is over

I am back in Indiana for a while. Soon to be ex wife is still in SC.  I won’t go into details, but drInking and grief don’t do well together.  So here I am 71 years old,  a a bag of clothes, my truck and some other crap to include laptop,  I don’t know how this will turn out but in any case, I failed , she failed and there is no going back.  My brother and sister will help me for a while until this falls out howver that goes.  Three years of feeling helpless and guilty are over, now a very uncertain future arrives, but at least I can sleep knowing I tried my best.

FEAR

Look at the news, nothing but FEAR, read comments on articles, more fear.  This is no way to live.  Peoples buttons are easily pushed using fear as the emotional driver.  Fear of war, Fear of weather, Fear of economy, Fear of damn near anything.  Then who ever is driving the article attempts to pin the fear on one person or a group.   As I have said before, the headlines rarely tell the whole story , reading the article usually does not support the headline and you have to dig a bit deeper to find the actual truth.  A thirty second video of anything  can not tell the whole story.  Usually the bigger the outrage the less the facts fit what is being pushed.  Some black guy being arrested by a group of cops, he gets his ass beat, a few days of outrage, driving the fear.  A few days later when the actual truth comes out , nothing from the press.  This is nothing new but it seems to be the norm and not the rare occasional item.  I no longer trust any of the news sources.

Things could be a lot worse

Stiches came out this morning.  Nurse said it looks good and the swelling and buising will go away in time.  No more huge bandage on my face and I can shave tomorrow.  My next appointment is in 3 months, so there is that.  In the real world this is by no means earth shaking,  in the last week a billion more important things happened.  I am sick of the political hate fest from both sides. It seems to be driven by a very small number of the population which is to be expected I guess, they are just more vocal trying to be important I guess.  I know this will pass, the fake outrage, the name calling won’t.

Common sense and courtesy seem to be a thing of the past.   Attacking people in the hospital and with terminal cancer seems to be the new norm for a certain part of our population.  Of course they would never say these things if they happened to be face to face, but that is how cowards and bullies operate.

Skin Cancer

Well it is back,  thought it might be something else but it was not to be.  Operation was yesterday, a big hole in the upper lip , but the surgeon did some moving and cutting and I should look human again in a month or so.  Currently on one of those evil opiod meds to control the pain.   The expert said this could have been from getting sunburns back when I was a kid in Indiana.  Who knows I have been in a lot of sunny places and sun screen was not a deal back those days.   The good news is the got it all.  This is the third spot in a couple of years.  Advice get anything looking wierd checked out. This ain’t fun.